So what exactly is The Big Picture?
It is a film project that I've come up with. The entire film, once finished, is going to follow a main character throughout an important journey in his life. The movie isn't meant to focus on his words or his actions, but more on how he discovers the universe inside of himself. The journey is both external and internal. It is external in a way that he has to get from point A to point C, not knowing that there is a world of B that he has yet to discover. It's internal in the sense that he is dealing with an ever changing environment that increase his capacity to understand simplicity in life. His mind expands as the picture keeps getting bigger.Because of time constraints, I had to narrow the project down significantly for the moment. The final product was a DVD and website promotional package that I've developed for when I go to release The Big Picture full-length film.
This website contains all of my explanations on this project, as well a number of illustrations and photos that I've gathered while making this project.
So what does The Big Picture mean?
In all honesty, this film was a search for god. I had no idea what god had become in my life.. if he, she or it was an important factor in my everyday life.I didn't know where else to go to find god, except in my crazy dreams and in my illustrations. I thought perhaps I would get answers if I drew them the right way.
What I ended up was getting the answers by myself. Four months later, and I still haven't found a physical god... but I have found The Big Picture.
The Big Picture, what I believe it to be, is the feeling of seeing earth from Space. Taking a look at a problem for what it's worth, and realizing just how insignificant it is in the meaning of time.
By creating this project, I've seen different parts of my brain come alive, and I've seen so many different angles to so many different situations. It truly feels as if I'm in the middle of the galaxy, and I can't even see Earth anymore... like a lost satellite in space. I take that for what its worth, wake up the next day and realize that the sun is up, and that aint half bad.
In four months, I've made this journey from one side of the wall to the other side.. I'm finally graduating college and I can finally look forward to what's outside the wall of this massive city I've been living in for 24 years of my life.
That's what this movie had to express.. the feeling of something leaving you, like a huge weight off your shoulders. The Big Picture is nothing but one person's imaginative creation of a perfect world. A world without end, they say.
...So did I find god? I'd have to say yes and no. I didn't find the god I thought I would find.. I found something different. I found the true meaning of what the word 'god' means. God is incredibly made up in every mind of every person alive. We each have our own different versions of god. So I started realizing that god only existed in my head. I finally got a chance to talk to it face to face.. turns out it's a great conversationalist, we had a lot in common. But the other form of god goes far beyond anything material or invented in our brains. It is the force of nature that keeps all of this breathing and living.. this planet, these galaxies, this universe.. The magnetic forces of life.. Are you starting to see the idea?
At this point I'm tired of reading
Maybe that voice inside of me wasn't god at all, maybe that voice inside of me, was just me.. Maybe I'm just talking to myself.. Praying to myself for all my sins that I've done in the past day. What if god is beyond all of us, and isn't a person, doesn't judge us, doesn't reign down fury, doesn't take our loved ones, isn't responsible for life, death, heaven, hell or even 'pergatory' (clearly a catholic term). Like I said, I didn't find god in all that brimstone and bible shananigans.. I found god in nature, I found god in other people, I found god when life struck me funny, and I couldn't quite explain it. But I hate calling it god, because it really isn't.God, to me, is taking a moment to stare at the telephone poles and asking a bunch of questions.. god to me is watching a sunset and talking to my dead grandmother... god to me is every person in my life. It's not some scary man in the sky.. it's a made-up feeling in your heart that you put faith in. It's that same faith that gets you through every journey in life.
The main point is that The Big Picture is just that.. seeing things outside of the box.. washing the dirt out of your eyes, pulling the feeding tube out, and throwing away your pills. I rarely see any movies that tackle conversations with god very well.. so I decided that it would be a good scene in my movie. I'll leave you on that note.
- Kevin Fitzpatrick 4.29.05
Please view The Big Picture project blog-journal.
Interesting Reads, and plenty to look at.